Give Him My Phone Number or Get His?

You meet an interesting guy somewhere, somehow, in one of several ways people meet each other. There is something about him, and you would like to get to know this man better either casually or seriously. If only there were some way to contact him without appearing desperate, or to let yourself be contacted without finding yourself stressing and insecure. Yes, technology has transformed faster then people have learned to maintain and dating etiquette changes almost as quickly. If only there were some magic formula to address your insecurities.

Short of being a student, there is no excuse for someone not to have a business card. Yes, the custom of buying business cards or calling cards needs one to carry around obnoxious pieces of paper everywhere you go. This is a small cost to pay for the officialness of the company card; the understanding that this man has a job (even if it’s freelancing) and at least one telephone line. If he does not have a business card, ask yourself if he’s a fantastic idea.

It is no secret that when somebody is interested, they may add their personal email address or telephone number to the card. If you are interested, do this, and tell him that you are doing it (“this is my private mobile phone number”). If he follows suit, you know he is at least marginally interested. In that case, smile, you have confidence. Otherwise, it is either aloofness or disinterest. You’ve indicated you are interested, but if he does not know, then it might have been for naught.

Honesty is a superb policy. Say something assertive, such as “I will call you in a few days,” and then take action. If you’re uncomfortable calling a man, clue him in: “I would like to hear from you soon”. Choose a path, and leave it at that. If you’re honest, you won’t have to think about the subtleties (What if I looked too desperate? What if he forgot to call? etc.). If you say you will call, he’ll expect a call from you. Don’t worry about ahead; simply make it. If you prompted him to call, file away his card and wait for a week. If he calls, great, otherwise, forget him, and get on with your life. Life is to short to play games, and honesty is a gorgeous thing.

Post Author: David Andrews